Monthly Archives: March 2014

What I learnt this week: Have a little faith

It’s easy to lose faith in many aspects of your life.  We all do.  Sometimes you wonder what’s the point?  At the end of the day maybe there is no point t.  But if that’s the case I want to enjoy life whilst I can.  As there ain’t no guarantee of tomorrow.

My week was brimming with hard work, in both my day job and moon lighting career.  I prepared for the guerrilla film making master class on the weekend.  Created a new website, which is no small feat for my technologically challenged self.   I designed new business cards.  Updated my you tube channel, blog, face book page and linked in account.  The only thing I still couldn’t bring myself to do was get down with Twitter.  I know I must but the hash tags confuse me!

Thursday night was a girls night; Shelley, Aisha (her friend) and me, met for cocktails in Covent Garden.  Then headed to Fire and Stone for pizza and Prosecco (best combo ever).  On to the 99 Comedy club, which was brilliant.  Apart from the last guy who still thinks women in the kitchen jokes are funny.  They’ve been done, done and done mate.  Us girls decided to walk out, why should we sit there and listen to crap when we’ve been at work all day- NOT IN THE KITCHEN?  What a dick.

On the plus side I sat next to some nice guys who make their own ice cream, and had just been to a French restaurant together.  I know what your thinking but they swore they weren’t gay!  We indulged in Hagen Daaz after the ice cream chat.  Headed home a little too tipsy for a school night.

Friday I was very restrained, straight home after work to finish my website.  Was slightly distracted by a text session with the Navy boy.  Oh well, a girls gotta do what a girls gotta do 🙂

Got up early headed to Regents park for a mind blowing two days of learning- at the guerrilla film making master class.  The first session was very philosophical, which I loved.  Then more technical.  Networking on the Saturday night.  Technical on the Sunday.  We had an inspirational guy, Johnny, who came and talked about his rise in the industry.  He started shakily in his career but kept going, never losing faith.  Now he has made a big budget film.

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Which brings me to my theme this week: Faith.  During one lunch this week, Siobhan was regaling a story about being wooed by a guy, only to have been spat out and used.  Now she’s only 22 (quite a few years younger than me).  And she’s losing faith.  Imagine where I’m at with guys on this topic!

Although at the end of the day I keep trying, somehow forgetting how much it hurts to get burnt.  However I’m learning.  These days I give up way quicker when the writing is on the wall.  But something makes me keep trying.  I believe it’s faith that the next one will be a keeper! NB Having a boyfriend will never, ever complete me.  I’m already a complete human.   And I love my life.  But a girl can dream of meeting prince charming!

My lesson in faith was also compounded when I was walking to the train station and some religious followers were handing out fliers.  Now I don’t believe in the bible, because I know it’s definitely not true.  Here’s my reasoning: if god was a man, does anyone really believe he could be organised enough to create the world in 6 days?  I have two brothers, a father and have been with countless guys who when it comes to organising- are as useful as a chocolate tea pot…

Everyone has faith is different things.  Faith in religious belief, faith in love (not just with a guy) and Johnny had faith he would succeed absolutely.  We can have faith in all aspects of life and why not?  It’s better to have faith than the alternative.  So go on have a little 🙂

Funniest moment: Obviously watching the comedy night.  I enjoyed when the one of the comedians asked me if I was from Aus and I replied, ‘Dunno mate, wada you reckon?’  Yep I’m Aussie through and through.

What I did that scared me: ‘Networked’ at the master class.  Why is it so are to just say hi to people?

Highs:

▪   Meeting some awesome new peeps at the workshop- Daisy, Abid, Oliver, Adina, Andromeda, Dianne.

▪   Making my writing commitment and making it real.

▪   Neil buying me flowers at work, so sweet.

Lows:

▪   Not enough time in the day.

▪   Hearing women in the kitchen jokes, ‘Ain’t nobody got time for that!’

▪   Not getting to the gym.

What I learnt: Faith is sometimes hard to grasp but help makes the world a wonderful place to live.

 

What I learnt this week: I’m baaaack!

So last week was horrible.   I’d lost my inspiration, my creative self, my passion.  Oh dear, it seemed ALL was lost.  But what a change a week can bring!

Work flew by in a flash.  That’s the best part about being busy!  You just have to get everything done and done!

Monday we started our new writer’s group.  Met Stu and Brendan at the ‘Slug’ in Angel.  Organized what we would do, how we would run things.  Getting s#@t done!

Alas, by Tuesday I was sick again.  I truly believe this was directly related to how I was feeling.  Because at this stage I was still mucho uninspired.

I wanted to push through, make myself write, but instead I did the opposite.  I took the night off.  I watched a film.  Something that I knew would make me feel good.

‘Eat, Pray, Love.’  And boy, was that what I needed.  I cried the majority of the film, but it felt good to let all my frustration out.  By morning it looked like my eyes had been replaced by puffer fish but I had started to get myself back.

Wednesday night I was even more inspired because I was lucky enough to witness Beyonce live in concert with Camilla.  Now that was a show.  An inspirational woman if ever there was!!!  Incredible.

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Friday was a pretty horrible day for me, I had to fire someone, which I’ve never done.  The girl was lovely but she just wasn’t right for the role.  After it was done I felt like I’d killed a kitten 🙁

Then I needed a couple of drinks! Kristen, came and met us as ‘Be at One’ for cocktails.  After that I headed off to Camden, to the notorious ‘Barfly’ for Brendans’ gig.  Also to celebrate with Stu for his B’day.  I was exhausted though and needed sleep, so it wasn’t late one.

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Saturday was soooo fun- I traveled (it took me 2 hours, because of delays) to Indu’s for a delicious lunch, much rum and a girly catch up with Martine, Alice and Shelley.  We ate, drank and talked A LOT!!!

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Me and Shelley continued the party, headed first to Leister square, had a wine with Kelly.  Then on to Shoreditch for more drinks.  Great day!  But 12 hours of drinking may have been a little excessive.

Got up Sunday- the sun was shining, the birds were singing, I went for a walk.  Spent the rest of the day writing in the back yard.  Nice.

This week’s lessons came thick and fast.  Which I believe was due to the fact  I’d done what I needed to get rid of the block, I was allowed to have what I needed.

I know I’ve talked about this in the past but it really hit home when I was reading about character development in a screenwriting book this week- ‘your character should never get what they want, only what they need.’

I realized that the universe wouldn’t throw anything at me that I’m not capable enough to handle!

Even more lessons…

– I learnt you just have to give yourself a break.  Don’t be your own worst enemy!

– I also learnt you have to make tough decisions.  It’s not pretty, but it’s a reality.

– I learnt alcohol should really be called truth serum.

– I learnt some friends you thought had class don’t, and some you thought didn’t actually do.

– I also learnt English guys have absolutely no game.

– I learnt Imagine Dragons are super amazing!

Funniest moment:

  • Indu’s lunch gathering.  The more rum, the more laughs.  A highlight was Shelley pranking Terry as a Zimbabwean teacher looking for work

What I did that scared me:

  • Sent random messages to a whole bunch of guys on tinder,  to see if I could get a reaction…I did

Highs:

  • Girls Saturday catch up
  • Beyonce with Camilla
  • Starting the writers group

Lows:

  • A wee bit much rum
  • Catching the plague
  • Being the bad guy

What I learnt:

  • No matter what you think you want.  You get what you need.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

What I learnt this week: Connection Failure

March already?  Seriously where does the time tick to?

Work busy (as usual) but I feel that I’m slowly getting somewhere with the new team.  Organisation won’t happen over night but it will happen.  I know what I’m capable of.   We also had a new starter Siobhan Cha Cha- yes, best name ever I know.  She is one of those people you can’t not like.

A few cool events this week: caught ‘Young Rebel Set,’ at the Lexington in Angel.  Which included drinks with Kelly.  Drinks that caught up with me on  Wednesday.  I still managed a double gym session with Shelley that night.  Boxing followed by shaking my white girl booty in a dance class!

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Lunch with Indu from work on Thursday, we chatted over a delicious curry.  Took a walk around the park, talked all things writing 🙂

Friday was pay day, so obviously that was a big night out!  The usual ‘2 for 1 ‘ cocktails at ‘Be at One.’  I did have quite a few concoctions, enjoyed the night but was home by 11pm.  Well before my coach had time to turn in to a pumpkin.

Friday night

This was due to the fact I had put my name down to work at the TNT travel show on Saturday.  That was a long one.  So many drunk Aussie’s and Kiwi’s in the same place.  On mass we’re a little much to be honest…

What did I learn: NOTHING.  Well not nothing.  You can always learn something even if you think you aren’t learning anything.  However this week there didn’t really seem to be a theme.  At least nothing obvious that I wanted to chat about.  I walked, this usually helps inspiration, I read, I listened to music, I researched,I ran, I waited. NOTHING.

For the first time in my life I have writer’s block.  I thought that was just an excuse for laziness.  I was wrong.  In realising this though it has made me examine why I’m currently uninspired.

And I do believe I’m bored.  Not in the sense that I don’t enjoy my  life and that I don’t have plenty to do.  But I just have this horrible feeling of apathy right now.

I’m not even really sure why.  I thought writing about it might give me a clue.  Alas it sounds even more stupid now I have written about it.  I guess it’s better out than in.

Maybe my computer was telling me something- you know when you get the ‘connection failure’ message.  That’s true of me right now.  Sometimes I do believe  all the things that help us connect e.g. Facebook, email, snap chat really don’t help us at all.  Yes, we have gained amazing technology but we have also lost the art of conversation?

Are we living through social media?  Sharing our world-the best, the worst bits and some people f$&king everything.  Are we living in reality or just in cyberspace?

I’m not sure what has created my disconnection, I don’t believe it’s social media (that was a little detour my blog took)  but I can tell you that this post has led me to think I need to do something drastic to snap myself out of this rut.  Not sure what it will be…the last time I realised I was in a rut I moved to London…

What I did that scared me:

  • I will reveal this next week if it pays off!

Funniest moment:

  • Watching my dance instructors face and how excited he got during the class.  Priceless.

Highs:

  • Catching up with Grahem, our tour guide from Scotland at the TNT travel show
  • Texted Navy boy from Scotland, interesting…
  • ‘Young Rebel Set’ from Scotland (hmmm, a very Scottish week, I like it)

Lows:

  • Food poisoning on Thursday
  • Dehydration
  • 6 day working week

What I learnt:

  • If you realise you’re in a rut.  Do something about it, or risk being swallowed by it…