Monthly Archives: March 2017

What I learnt this week: My therapist…Adele

Last weekend I saw Adele perform live in concert.  From the moment she stepped on stage I was captivated. Not only is she exceptionally talented, her personality is infectious. You can’t not like her ‘I don’t give a shit what you think’ attitude. Although somehow she still manages to appear humble. I don’t know how the girl does it!

To be honest I wasn’t the biggest fan of her music when I first heard it. But I’m definitely converted now. And hearing her sing her heart out in the flesh only made me love her more. The raw emotions that she pours into her songs is the reason I believe she’s so popular, (apart from having the voice all the angels ever born).

I spoke to friends who were at the concert too and they had the same reaction when she first came out- we were overwhelmed and had a little cry. Not because we were sad but we were definitely overcome. Adele has a way of sharing a little bit of her soul that makes it a cathartic experience for everyone that hears her.

During the show I actually deleted photos of my ex-boyfriend that I hadn’t been able to let go of. It may sound silly but Adele shifted something in me.  Her whole performance was kinda like a big therapy session. Crying over loves that hurt us, laughing out loud at her jokes and feeling strong from the words of advice she offered.

The last song she sang was ‘Someone like you.’ Not my fav. However, after she described how the song came about I loved it. Adele never wrote it to get famous. She wrote it because she needed to help herself move on. And that resonated with people around the world. Clearly!

We’ve all been there- unable get over someone we’ve cared about. Told it will take time. And it will. But that doesn’t make it hurt any less. It’s been 5 months since my sudden break-up.  I’ve done all the things you do when it happens- cry, get angry, talk to friends, get drunk.  I didn’t get a drastic new hair cut but I contemplated it!  Because the thing is you do whatever you can until you feel ok.

And one day you will feel ok. One day you will stop hating that person. You may actually think of them and hope they’re ok too. Hope that they found what they were looking for. Hope above all that they’re happy (although maybe not as happy as when they were with you). At the end of the day the only healthy thing we can do is to move on because like my good friend Adele said- ‘Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead.’

What I learnt this week: Who’s driving this thing?

Last weekend I spent the night at an ashram.  It was incredibly blissful and exactly what I needed.  Time to unwind and just be.  I was able to slow down and take things at my own pace.  Everyone needs to be able to do that but it has become increasingly difficult to do so.  Or has it?

Before I reveal what I learnt, I’ll tell you about my experience at Rocklyn Ashram.

I arrived, utterly exhausted on the Saturday afternoon.  Put my tent up in the blazing sun.  From here on in things started to get better.  Afternoon tea was served- a delightful apple pie, coupled by a cuppa under the shade of a peach tree.  Once I soaked in the superb serenity I started to feel better.

At 3.30pm it was time for yoga beside the dam.  After the session I showered and prepared for the ‘Havan’- a healing ceremony.  Now…this was a lot of chanting.  And I mean a lot!  I’ve gotten my over active mind on board with meditation and slowing down my yoga practice but I’m not enlightened enough to chant prayers a million times.  However I persevered and listened to everyone else around me.  And I did feel lighter afterwards.

Dinner was baked veggies and herbs from the garden- delicious.  I was full, content and ready for bed.  Slept in my tent with the windows open, watching the stars and listening to the birds (praying that a snake wouldn’t sneak into my tent and get me).

As you may have guessed I wasn’t eaten by a ravenous beast.   And I actually slept in, missing the morning yoga session! I must have needed the sleep!  Ate breaky and finished reading ‘Wild’ in my cosy little bed.

At 9am I decided to help the kitchen prepare lunch- it’s called Karma Yoga (doing things whilst being mindful).  Kinda like working for free but you do it gladly.  However after pulling spikey pumpkin leaves apart for 2 hours, I felt I’d earnt enough good karma.  Went and joined a meditation class, followed by lunch at the dam.

Spent the afternoon writing, feeling the cool breeze on my skin and sun on my feet.  But then it was time to leave.  I packed my tent with a heavy heart because I knew I had to go back to my hectic life.  As I drove away I was on the verge of tears.

How could I hold on to the feeling of serenity I’d discovered and bring it into my life?

There had to be a way…

I hit the highway after driving on 7km’s of dirt road.  I went from 40km’s to 100km’s.  It was too fast.  I felt out of control.  Even though it was the speed limit- it was too much!  That’s when it dawned on me.  I’m the one with my foot on the accelerator.  I’m in control! So I slowed down.  I drove the pace I wanted to go.  The pace I was comfortable with.

Sooooo, I realised that I could take this idea into my life.  I control my diary- how and when I do things.  Yes, I have deadlines but how I approach them is up to me.   I get to choose how fast I want to drive in my life.  Even if there’s some crazy maniac behind me, tooting and swearing at me to go faster-  I don’t have to!  I can pull over any time.

Because I’m in the driver’s seat of my life.